What if we change the narrative on neurodiversity?

swan image because they are beautiful, graceful, and we've all heard the story of the ugly duckling right?

What if we chang the narrative on neurodiversity?

What if we celebrate it instead of fear it?

I believe neurodiversity is something to be celebrated, not feared. It is not something that can be cured, changed or avoided. It is a difference in the wiring in our brain.

While it is true that some neurodevelopmental disorders can be caused or enhanced by medical issues, substance abuse during pregnancy, parental and maternal health etc.; many neurodevelopmental disorders are merely a difference in the way the brain is wired. It is genetic and it can’t be predicted, controlled or avoided.

Before I continue, I want to make sure that, you the reader, understands that I know that not all neurodivergence is "easy". Infact, I don't think it matters how "high functioning" an individual is... Neurodiversity is HARD! And raising neurodiverse children is HARD! After all, studies have shown that mothers of autistic children have the same symptoms as PTSD patients. As a mother of an Autistic child, and as someone diagnosed with PTSD after my daughter's death, I can attest to this finding. Neurodivergence is HARD! However, I do think that changing the narrative is important. It won't make living with Neurodivergence easier... but maybe more toleranble???

All neurodiversity is important and beautiful. But the narrative has been negative. The focus has always been on the challenges and how to fix the person so they can fit in to the box that society creates for itself. Neurodiverse people have been institutionalized, sterilized, and even euthanized. Neurodiversity has been seen as a burden on society. However, this narrative has come along way since then thanks to psychological and neurological advances that have brought more knowledge to what neurodiversity actually is and how to support it.

Neurodiversity isn’t something to be fixed. It is something to be celebrated. It is beautiful and powerful and is absolutely needed in order to benefit society. But the focus is still too much on the negative. In many schools the idea is still on how to help the child fit in. However I’ve personally seen schools and teachers who make adaptations to their teaching and their classrooms to make it more accessible and comfortable for the student. THIS is a positive way to look at neurodiversity. This is acceptance. It’s not asking the child to adapt to an unfriendly environment. It’s adapting the environment to make it more friendly. This is inclusion.

A single pink rose in full bloom symbolizes the beauty and diversity of neurodivergent minds, each unique and vibrant in its own way.

But what if we take it a step further? What if every month we highlight a neurodivergent way of being? What if in schools and classrooms, and even in the workplace, we show the strengths of neurodivergent people? What if we highlight the individual achievements of people who are neurodiverse? This could look like taking famous people with neurodiversity and showing what they have done. What if doing this, and changing our language makes it so that kids growing up in this world learn to love their difference instead of fear it?

I am neurodivergent. I have ADHD. I didn’t get diagnosed until I was 32. I went through life feeling different and broken. I felt incapable of being able to accomplish things. I felt inadequate in everything I didn’t. I didn’t think I had any talents, or any value. I hid who I was, and tried to fit myself into what I thought was the "right way". This way of thinking nearly broke me. It caused so much trauma and mental health issues and because of it, my children, my husband, and I all suffered. And then I got diagnosed with ADHD. Instead of fearing it, I EMBRACED it. Learning that there was a REASON for my struggles, and that I wasn't broken was like taking a breath of fresh air. I celebrated the fact that I wasn’t broken! I accepted that I just needed to do things in a different way. I finally understood that I was just wired differently and I needed to do things MY way. A different way. This is what I teach my neurodivergent children. I have children on the autism spectrum; I have children with ADHD; I might even have a kid with dyslexia (yet to be officially determined). None of these are bad. They are just different and require different tools and strategies.

So what if we change the way we view neurodiversity, starting in elementary school. What if we make big emphasized celebrations of these differences to help kids learn that being different is ok!?!

Because it’s not just kids that are struggling. It’s also adults who are too scared to speak up. They are too scared to tell you they just got their autistic diagnosis, and the lights in the office are far too bright and stimulating for them to work effectively... that if they could work from home, or have certain accomodations, then they can work and often outperform their neurotypical peers.

We’ve come a long way towards acceptance, but we need to do even more to become inclusive. Especially in the workplace.